I hope people can find true happiness.
I hope people care more, eat less, sleep more, cry less, laugh more, lie less.
I hope people can keep their differences aside, be more respectful.
I hope people would remind themselves we are all people, not man/woman, white/black, native/immigrant.
I hope the boundaries disappear, travel becomes easy.
I hope immigration officers don’t exist.
I hope I continue to live, travel, love, laugh, and believe.
I hope I make this world the kind of place I want to live in.
Filed under Attitude, Bonding, Communication, Culture, Emotions, Environment, Expectations, Experiences, Faith, Friends, Inspiration, Life, Living my life, Motivation, musings, Opinion, People, Personal, Philosophy, Plans, Priorities, Resolutions, Society, Thoughts, Travel
Papa, “I don’t think people like me”, I said one day. I was just stating an observation. “Why would you say that”, he asked. People tease me in school. They make fun of my hair and my round face. They call me names. He smiled, and he asked me, ” Are you sure they don’t like you?” He said no more.
No I wasn’t sure that they didn’t like me. So I told myself if they were talking to me, teasing me-yeah semantics they must actually like me. I learned to laugh off the unwanted attention.
For the longest time, I thought my father had ruined my perception of people’s reaction to me. I read people wrong. Perhaps I do. But what he did right was instill a level of confidence in my self-worth and my own being. Nothing anyone says, can instill any doubts in me about myself.
Thank you, papa.
Now only if people who retorted to this New York times article could have been more proud of their own achievements, than belittle it by being “offended” by a cartoonist.
Filed under Abstract, Attitude, Communication, Confusion, Conversations, Doubts, Emotions, Experiences, Hope, Humor, Inspiration, Life, musings, Philosophy
My mum took up studying when I was barely 8. Her sudden disappearance from my life was hard to deal with, making me a troublesome pre-teen. She and I learned to adjust together and also respect each other’s needs. My mother could have given up her own dreams to take care of me and my family. But she kept going, struggling and not being perfect in any way. She wasn’t scared of breaking down in tears before exams, or speaking to my father about how her children were driving her crazy.
She wasn’t around for the first Christmas party I went to and I still feel embarrassed about showing up in my school uniform. I had to learn to plait my own hair because she just didn’t have time. I even learned to cook and fend for myself as you know teenagers get hungry at all odd times of the day. Needless to say, I was angry with her for not being around. Now that I think about it, I have so many little stories that I could tell you and complain about and ones that still bother me in some ways.
That was eons ago and like any rational well balanced adult, I have all that behind me. Except not everything is. Today when I am faced with difficult decisions, conflicting priorities and impossible choices I take a deep breath and think what would my mum have done?
I now know her life wasn’t easy, neither were the choices she had to make. She did however and I don’t know if she knows it, set the best example she could as a patient mother, devoted wife, career oriented dignified woman. When I am lost and weary and tired and feel defeated I often think of my mum. I know it would be okay to struggle, but moving forward is the name of the game. I know there will be days when I will feel defeated, and feel like nothing is going my way. I know it is okay to shed a tear and not feel weak. I know that no matter what, life goes on, children grow up, husbands learn to feed themselves and people will understand.
My mother gave me lessons on finding my place in this world. While I know I have to be the daughter, wife, sister, aunt, cousin, niece, friend I need not forget that I am important too.
Life doesn’t always go as planned. You don’t always get what you want or think you deserved. Actually life isn’t ever fair and that is the only expectation one can keep from it.
We have a choice. Sit around and be miserable, or get up and do something about changing your circumstances. This talk speaks volumes to me when I drift off the chosen path.
Hope it can help you too. Happy Monday y’all.
I signed up for my first ever 5K run. I have never run in my life. I think you along with everyone who knows me knows my disdain for running. It isn’t running I disdain. It is my inability to run. I have masked it all these years but now I am ready to shake that. I am ready to accept my fears and shortcomings and I am ready to face them. In 8 weeks I will be running my first race ever.
As I signed up for it, I thought of you my coach. I thought of all the things you taught me about getting out of my comfort zone, about challenging my body and my mind, about visualizing success and going for it. Most of all about believing in myself.
Last year when I met you, I didn’t ever think I would be swimming, or would hike the Grand Canyon. I was even told I couldn’t get pregnant. Then you came along with your positivity and go getting attitude. I heard of your own struggles and saw how you never gave up. I didn’t see any self pity or self doubt. I saw conviction and determination. It made me realize how trivial some of my problems were and how I could over come them myself.
A 5K isn’t a big deal in the grand scheme of things. It is a big deal to me. The fact that I am thinking about it and have just registered for it, I know what I have just challenged myself to. I think of you, because at another time on another day with different circumstances I think you would have been proud of me. I would have been so happy and excited to tell you all about it.
Unfortunately we no longer share that rapport. I know I messed up, like I tend to with people I love the most. I’m so infamous for ruining my most treasured relationships that even my mother warned me against fighting with you. What is unfortunate is that we didn’t even have a fight. We have just drifted apart. I want to tell you about my running, about my swimming progress, about my school and life in general, like I used to.
But here I am, hoping that you know, for all the doubts and pain and misunderstanding, I miss you terribly my dear coach, my trusted friend.
It was so good to see you. You wont ever know how much it has meant to see you happy and in your element. You have given me the motivation and inspiration for another few months. Yes you have that effect on me and there is nothing anyone of us can do about that. I love you in ways I cannot define. I wonder if you know.. how do you feel about me?