Category Archives: Plans

A girl can hope..

I hope people can find true happiness.

I hope people care more, eat less, sleep more, cry less, laugh more, lie less.

I hope people can keep their differences aside, be more respectful.

I hope people would remind themselves we are all people, not man/woman, white/black, native/immigrant.

I hope the boundaries disappear, travel becomes easy.

I hope immigration officers don’t exist.

I hope I continue to live, travel, love, laugh, and believe.

I hope I make this world the kind of place I want to live in.

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Monday Madness

Yes I have started using circulating hashtags as my blog post titles. I have absolutely no creative juices flowing. Just life happening to me and happening very fast.

We are moving from our one bedroom apartment to a two bedroom apartment. We had planned this move in time for the baby. We knew our mothers would come visit us once the baby was born and we thought a bigger place would be a good idea. Our baby is long gone but we decided to move anyway. So if any of you need a place to stay in New York city, we have an extra bedroom. Mixed feelings at this time are an understatement. I am doing my best to be excited about the change.

I have committed to writing my master’s thesis in the next 6 weeks. With the move, doctor’s follow-ups, current courses, and new job search, this is an added stress I didn’t need. But I have it and I don’t plan to back down.

My weight loss/health issues are taking a back seat. This bums me out the most but hope to get back on track. If I have learned anything in life, our health/lifestyle is the only thing we have control over. If you are anything like me, then you like that control and you really shouldn’t let go of it.

I have so much buzzing in my head these days. The US election for one, about which I want to write my thoughts on. So much is being said and written about it already, that I don’t want to add to the noise. Then again my thoughts matter so I hope I will. I want to go another vacation before the year ends, get a new job, get the master’s thesis written and get back to baby making plans. More on that another time.

How are all of you doing this Monday evening?

 

 

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Thought-pourri

Only until a few days ago, I had not hit the 30 day mark. I thought I had plenty of time and boom, I am 2 days over. While we didn’t really exchange any words I was here wondering if anyone else had.

Times are confusing. The body, mind and heart wants three very different things. The constant internal struggle is exhausting. Playing it cool, isn’t working in my favor at the moment.

Do the work, people told me. A degree gets you no where. That could be true. Am I hiding from the real world behind academia? I often question myself.

There are days when I am euphoric and I want to scream out to the world. Then there are days that I am worried and scared and my spirits are dampened. The manic depressive states has taken on a brand new meaning in this ones life.

Relationships-are they real, or they belong to a make believe world? There is always a constant flow of people which I thoroughly enjoy. But are there any roots to be laid?

When I look at him, most times I see my best friend, my buddy, sometimes he is just a little boy I love and want to take care of. Then there are days  I rest my head on his shoulders feeling loved, cared for, safe and grounded.

“Life is either a daring adventure or nothing at all” – Hellen Keller.

Life continues to be a wonderful challenge.  How have you been?

 

 

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Are we there yet?

Personal post about my infertility experience… you have been warned.

There is a very slim chance that we could be pregnant. I never understood why people talked about being pregnant in plural, because only the woman is ever pregnant. Like really what does the man have to do with it? Now having worked at it consciously for the last two years, let’s face it ladies – we don’t get pregnant alone. A partner, friend, chum, husband, sperm donor , sometimes all bundled in one is what it takes to get us there.

In my case, the husband has been not just the voice of reason, an anchor, my support system through some very hormonal days , my friend when I managed to alienate others, my partner in crime, my chaperon at every doctor’s visit, but my man, my love, my life.

So when we were faced with signing consents f0r the potential IVF, I was a little thrown off by  what each of thinks is an obvious choice. For e.g. in the event we separate from each other in the next year, my husband thought the fertilized embryos should automatically go to me. Why? Don’t you want them?  Or in the event we both died, he thinks the embryos should go to my mom. I wanted to nominated my very single 38 year old friend who I have known for the last 15+ years. I felt like she knows me best and she would be the best person to raise my child, as who else could tell my child about me, like only she knows. I thought it was a mutually beneficial decision. I guess there is practicality and then there is practicality. Also if we were to both die, I don’t really think it matters what would happen to those embryos.

How much can we really plan for right? So here I am eagerly awaiting the next blood test, ready to plunge into the next phase of this journey and wondering how much do I really know anything any more?

 

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One month down!

Daymn! Time passes off fast. This has to be the most repeated statement ever. This is my monthly check-in with my resolutions- so if you are looking for an earth shattering, soul stimulating, cryptic, funny or philosophical post, this is the time you stop reading and find another blog post to ruminate over. This right here is just a check-in from this post:

Things I’ve got: Done and dusted for the month of January!

  • Drink more water, 10K steps daily at a minimum
  • Write at least one paper every 3 months- working on it. Will finish 3 papers this week
  • Network on a daily basis
  • Get a better job- Got a new job!
  • Log in a daily thought- Yes!
  • Learn to bake bread, try new recipes, try new cuisines- three breads this month
  • Meal prep weekly, weigh my food, log food, water and exercise diligently- Yes!
  • Read articles, books that don’t include school work, research articles, and news.- 1984, Gone girl, NYT!
  • Blog/Instagram/ Write reviews regularly. Make a schedule and stick with it.
  • Limit online/social activity: Do it daily but restrict the number of hours on it- An hour daily.
  • Continue and increase recycling- remember almost everything can be recycled- More about this in posts to come.
  • Continue and do better with minimalistic living- Loving it! It is hard though.
  • Let go of people, places, ideas and thoughts that don’t want to stay- Not that hard.
  • Remember that money saved is money earned- Oh yeah!

Things I need to work on/ or are a work in progress:

  • Complete Master’s thesis- I haven’t even started yet.
  • Complete all pending research papers -on the way.
  • Weight training, swimming, yoga to be incorporated in weekly routines- Haven’t started with swimming yet.
  • Sort out pending paper work from last year- Haven’t really started.
  • Read the newspaper daily, not monthly- Not happening yet. February-c’mmon step it up baby.
  • Wake up early(6am-ish), exercise, shower, light an aggarbatti at the home. Not waking up early, but rest is good.
  • Invest in property- started the process to find out how much we can afford.
  • Travel to a destination outside of the US- May not happen with the new job, baby making plans etc. But a girl can dream right.
  • Learn Spanish-this is the year
  • Go skating this year-maybe
  • Learn to dance -maybe

 

 

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Call a spade a spade

Plan, resolution, intention, hope- call it what you want everyone wants to see better versions of themselves. I don’t think anyone can deny there is something about the date changing that inspires us to make changes in our lives. I have banked on this feeling for the last two years. I will admit putting things down in writing makes for a good source of accountability, reference and motivation. Unlike the past few years I have been working on my list of minor alterations that I have been wanting to do for a while. My list is long and extensive, but by no means complete. Simple mundane things of daily living have found their way into my list. So instead of scribbling these on paper, I decided to jot them down here:

  • Wake up early(6am-ish), exercise, shower, light an aggarbatti at the home
  • Drink more water, 10K steps daily at a minimum
  • Read the newspaper daily, not monthly
  • Complete Master’s thesis
  • Complete all pending research papers
  • Write at least one paper every 3 months
  • Network on a daily basis
  • Get a better job
  • Log in a daily thought
  • Learn to bake bread, try new recipes, try new cuisines
  • Meal prep weekly, weigh my food, log food, water and exercise diligently
  • Weight training, swimming, yoga to be incorporated in weekly routines
  • Read articles, books that don’t include school work, research articles, and news.
  • Blog/Instagram/ Write reviews regularly. Make a schedule and stick with it.
  • Limit online/social activity: Do it daily but restrict the number of hours on it
  • Sort out pending paper work from last year
  • Continue and increase recycling- remember almost everything can be recycled
  • Continue and do better with minimalistic living
  • Let go of people, places, ideas and thoughts that don’t want to stay
  • Remember that money saved is money earned
  • Invest in property
  • Travel to a destination outside of the US
  • Learn Spanish-this is the year
  • Go skating this year-maybe
  • Learn to dance -maybe

Hmm, I think I will do a monthly check on this list. I am happy to say 2 weeks down and I have been sticking to this plan already. What are your goals?

 

 

 

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It will only get better

I don’t want to say good bye to 2015, but it isn’t staying is it now? It hasn’t been the most productive or ground breaking year I have had but it helped me grow a lot. For all the lessons I have learned, for the personal growth I have had, the people I met and the people I hope to meet some day, 2015 was a beautiful year.

Here is to 2016! Happy New Year everyone!

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