Category Archives: Health

I am going to give this one last good fight!

Thank you to all of you who have wept with me and for me. Those of you who emailed, messaged, and sent lovely notes full of love and prayer and warmth and concern. Even those of you that stayed silent, know that I understand. Some things are just hard to make any conversation about. I have been in that spot. I just didn’t know what to say, so I said a silent prayer, hoping things would get better for the person struggling.

The good thing with struggle is that I find them very character building. I had to truly work on myself and not go down the rabbit hole of asking myself or god, why me? I taught myself to say, so that happened, as does life to everyone, where to next?

I have taken my time. I have changed homes, I have traveled to 11 countries in the interim, I have worked on my relationship with my mother, I have embraced yoga, healthy eating and regular walks. I haven’t yet reached the stage of meditation or veganism, but I feel I am pretty close to being awesome ( my own measure). I definitely feel ready to give the possibility of a family with a child in it a good fight.

Join me, as I tell you more about this journey, struggle and what hormones can do to a relatively normal person!

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Happy Thanksgiving…

You know the biggest joke about thanksgiving?  “Only people in American will have bloody wars over materialistic things 24 hours after they have said thanks for everything they already have.”

Despite all the commercialization, blood bath and expensive travel that happens this week, Thanksgiving continues to be my favorite American holiday.

You get blessings, kindness and love from the most unexpected places. My father used to tell me that always do good, with no expectations in return. Even if you don’t receive from the same person, God will look out for you and you will receive when the time is right. Just do your thing. I am thankful for that advice now more than ever. Having had a few rough years myself, I have reaffirmed my belief that everyone has their own struggles. Just because we know nothing about them, and people always put up a brave front, doesn’t mean they don’t have struggles of their own. Be nice, it doesn’t take away anything from anyone. I am very grateful for the sound advise.

I am very thankful for my husband. Not only has he loved me despite all odds, he has embraced my family, my friends, along with our craziness. I haven’t changed as a person “just because I got married.” I have changed a great deal because I have grown up as a person, professionally and personally. I continue to be a work in progress, but every time I look into my husband’s eyes- I see his idea of perfection. I am very grateful for his love.

There are people I haven’t met in person, or met very briefly, and yet I am very thankful they are in my life. Some have sent me countless messages of encouragement, love and support while others have given it to me straight. Even though life has tried it’s best to pull me down, it has also showed me just how you bounce back, thanks to these very people. I am very grateful to know, that people who have full lives of their own will take time out for you. Whether it is making you feel special on your birthday, or remind you that there is no place for stress-induced-ruining-of-health. I am very grateful to see them make a place for me, even in their very full hearts.

I am thankful to this blogging space. No matter how much you have been ignored, you are right where I need you to be. I am really glad I have this space to vent /rant /complain /reminisce /pontificate /laugh /ridicule and just be myself. Eleven years and going strong!

Happy Thanksgiving y’all.

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Monday Madness

Yes I have started using circulating hashtags as my blog post titles. I have absolutely no creative juices flowing. Just life happening to me and happening very fast.

We are moving from our one bedroom apartment to a two bedroom apartment. We had planned this move in time for the baby. We knew our mothers would come visit us once the baby was born and we thought a bigger place would be a good idea. Our baby is long gone but we decided to move anyway. So if any of you need a place to stay in New York city, we have an extra bedroom. Mixed feelings at this time are an understatement. I am doing my best to be excited about the change.

I have committed to writing my master’s thesis in the next 6 weeks. With the move, doctor’s follow-ups, current courses, and new job search, this is an added stress I didn’t need. But I have it and I don’t plan to back down.

My weight loss/health issues are taking a back seat. This bums me out the most but hope to get back on track. If I have learned anything in life, our health/lifestyle is the only thing we have control over. If you are anything like me, then you like that control and you really shouldn’t let go of it.

I have so much buzzing in my head these days. The US election for one, about which I want to write my thoughts on. So much is being said and written about it already, that I don’t want to add to the noise. Then again my thoughts matter so I hope I will. I want to go another vacation before the year ends, get a new job, get the master’s thesis written and get back to baby making plans. More on that another time.

How are all of you doing this Monday evening?

 

 

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How you doin?*

First day of the 8th month of 2016! Below is where I am with my plans.  Everything in bold is already done and dusted. Those in italics are a work in progress. Life has changed, plans have changed accordingly.

More important than the list that is only pertinent to my life is that life happens and just keeps happening. Plans are just plans. Something work out and other things stop being a priority. I like plans. They keep me on point. They remind me of all the things I have always wanted to do or considered important enough for me at some point to be done.

But that’s not how life turns out. I think it has been the most humbling experience of my life. Nothing has really worked out the way I have planned it. There came a time when I even stopped planning and there in lays the problem. I’ve learned that no plan is a sure path to failure. So that changed thanks to this list.

  • Drink more water, 10K steps daily at a minimum
  • Read the newspaper daily, not monthly
  • Complete Master’s thesis – converted to PhD in Clinical Service
  • Complete all pending research papers
  • Write at least one paper every 3 months- working on several projects
  • Network on a daily basis
  • Get a better job- daily work in progress
  • Log in a daily thought- daily work in progress
  • Learn to bake bread, try new recipes, try new cuisines
  • Meal prep weekly, weigh my food, log food, water and exercise diligently
  • Weight training, swimming, yoga to be incorporated in weekly routines
  • Read articles, books that don’t include school work, research articles, and news.
  • Blog/Instagram/ Write reviews regularly. Make a schedule and stick with it.
  • Sort out pending paper work from last year
  • Continue and increase recycling- remember almost everything can be recycled
  • Continue and do better with minimalistic living
  • Let go of people, places, ideas and thoughts that don’t want to stay
  • Remember that money saved is money earned
  • Invest in property
  • Travel to a destination outside of the US- Europe 🙂
  • Learn Spanish-this is the year

*Joey from F.R.I.E.N.D.S way of saying hello..:)

 

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5 months down, 7 more to go.

What is this year going to mean for me, I often ask myself. Do you? I often hold a mirror to see what I have become. Life happens to all of us, but what do we do about it? How do we let is shape us?  I don’t always like what I see in the mirror, but I tell myself things will get better. To keep myself accountable, I made a list of things I wanted to achieve by the end of this year.

The ones in bold are what I haven’t yet worked on but I need/want to rectify that. So here I am, making myself accountable on my blog.

  • Wake up early(6am-ish), exercise, shower, light an aggarbatti at the home
  • Drink more water, 10K steps daily at a minimum
  • Read the newspaper daily, not monthly
  • Complete Master’s thesis
  • Complete all pending research papers
  • Write at least one paper every 3 months
  • Network on a daily basis
  • Get a better job
  • Log in a daily thought
  • Learn to bake bread, try new recipes, try new cuisines- Tried a few Thai Dishes
  • Meal prep weekly, weigh my food, log food, water and exercise diligently
  • Weight training, swimming, yoga to be incorporated in weekly routines
  • Read articles, books that don’t include school work, research articles, and news.
  • Blog/Instagram/ Write reviews regularly. Make a schedule and stick with it.
  • Limit online/social activity: Do it daily but restrict the number of hours on it
  • Sort out pending paper work from last year
  • Continue and increase recycling- remember almost everything can be recycled
  • Continue and do better with minimalistic living
  • Let go of people, places, ideas and thoughts that don’t want to stay
  • Remember that money saved is money earned
  • Invest in property: May not happen this year
  • Travel to a destination outside of the US
  • Learn Spanish-this is the year
  • Go skating this year-maybe – I went rock climibing instead.
  • Learn to dance -maybe

I know what some of you may say. Well I’ve got almost 50% of my list and we are not even done with half the year. Sometimes though to get what you want to do, you have to work on things every day of your life until you can finally bear fruits.. sometimes those very things mean much more than others.

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Friday Fives!

If I asked my 23 year old self, I would have said that I have a lot of time, medical science has advanced so much that the biological clock was a matter of old folks tales. There are plenty of stories of women in their 40’s getting pregnant. That holds true now more than then. What no one tells you is the costs of getting pregnant so late in life. I am not even alluding to money. After all, who puts a price tag on a child. The costs are more in terms of time, emotions and physical struggle. By the time a woman is in her 30’s the responsibilities, stress, commitments she has is way more than one anticipates in their 20’s. So here I am into my late 30’s wondering if I would fail in the one superpower I was born with?

The presidential electoral candidates in the United States has me worried. The country being largely divided into two groups it is difficult to agree with all the principles of one party over the other. Each party brings in good ideas with some very bad ones. Of course people vote for the party and not an individual, but don’t individuals matter? Right now all I see is a bunch of clowns. Or has Obama really set the bar that high?

Being the doctor, I am a go to person for a lot of people. I consider it a privilege that people would trust me with their most intimate fears. Come to me for a second opinion, an idea they want to run by, just to voice their concerns, or just use my being a doctor as an excuse to speak with me. When I have my doctor hat on, I am always happy to be of service. So when I get push back on the healthy living articles I forward to family and friends, or when people tell me to “chill” when I remind them that they should get their yearly medical check-ups, I am left wondering at the irony at the situation.

Please don’t kill my blog. I appreciate the fact that there are people who read my blog. Some of you that do,  reached out to me via emails/texts/instagram asking me if I was okay based on my last post. However well meaning you were, I really would have preferred comments here which is why I didn’t encourage conversations on other mediums. I write a post, to generate conversation here. If I wanted to reach out to you in person, I would have. Imagine how many more people we could have reached if we talked about things here. Blogging begets comments on blog. A blogger can hope.

On the most positive note, I was invited to join the swimming master’s class this week. I have been wanting to get to that level for a while now, but don’t think I am ready. My old swim coach mentioned that he will work at my level and get me to speed. I cannot wait. Needless to say I am excited like a school girl and giddy with happiness at the prospect of working with my old coach after 18 months.

What is making you excited and happy or sad and confused? Have a great weekend you all.

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The struggle is real!

Wow 22 days since my last post. So much has happened, needless to say. Time flies when you are having fun they say, or when life takes such a turn that you want to bury your head in a deep hole and never come out of it. I am not liking being an adult. This phase has been tough to put it mildly. I almost had a nervous breakdown last week.  A very new feeling for me. I used to think nervous breakdowns were an urban myth. Then I survived it. Or perhaps I have become adept at faking it, till I make it. To overcome the feeling of impending doom, I decided to shut down completely; help reset the brain. No phone calls, messages, social media, well meaning friends, not so well meaning family, husband, neighbor, you get the idea. Suddenly, like the coming on of a light bulb I felt like there was no point in all the stress I was taking on. So what that I am jobless, with a master’s loan looming on my head, my husband might lose his job this week, we are struggling emotionally and physically due to lack of a baby, need to work on my master’s thesis, mothers are being mothers, cousins have failing kidneys, closest friend is now a recovering alcoholic and our adopted friends are really getting onto our nerves. Really when you lay it out like that, it is just another weekday! No biggie!

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