Only until a few days ago, I had not hit the 30 day mark. I thought I had plenty of time and boom, I am 2 days over. While we didn’t really exchange any words I was here wondering if anyone else had.
Times are confusing. The body, mind and heart wants three very different things. The constant internal struggle is exhausting. Playing it cool, isn’t working in my favor at the moment.
Do the work, people told me. A degree gets you no where. That could be true. Am I hiding from the real world behind academia? I often question myself.
There are days when I am euphoric and I want to scream out to the world. Then there are days that I am worried and scared and my spirits are dampened. The manic depressive states has taken on a brand new meaning in this ones life.
Relationships-are they real, or they belong to a make believe world? There is always a constant flow of people which I thoroughly enjoy. But are there any roots to be laid?
When I look at him, most times I see my best friend, my buddy, sometimes he is just a little boy I love and want to take care of. Then there are days I rest my head on his shoulders feeling loved, cared for, safe and grounded.
“Life is either a daring adventure or nothing at all” – Hellen Keller.
Life continues to be a wonderful challenge. How have you been?