When doctors get it wrong. 

Personal details to follow.

I’m waiting to go back to the fertility specialist. 

When I met him last year the one thing no one asked us at this clinic was how often my husband and I had sex. The frequency, quality and timing of sexual encounter are very essential aspects in the baby making process. 

Just because we are a happily married couple who don’t believe in abstinence or protection, and definitely beat the national average of how many times we do it in a week, we may not necessarily be doing it right. 

Question to you- How many people does it take to ruin the chances of conceiving a baby during 6 years of marriage. Well two of course. The odds really go up when the two are you guessed it a doctor and a banker. 

Against all odds we conceived naturally last year. Well when you start aiming it right, at the right time, put healthy habits, like exercise and diet to the mix, your chances go up. 

Unfortunately we lost a perfect little boy. I’m not looking forward to this conversation with the infertility specialist. Last time we left his office our options were in-vitro fertilization or adoption. This time I have no clue what to expect. Gulp! 

Wish me luck! 



Filed under Confusion, Decisions, Determination, Disappointments, Emotions, Expectations, Experiences, Facts, Faith, Fears, Health, Humor, Issues, Life, Loss, Love, Marriage, Motivation, Pain, People, Philosophy, Pregnancy, Priorities, Questions., Sad, Thoughts, Update, Wishes

11 responses to “When doctors get it wrong. 

  1. Good luck. So sorry for your loss. My wife lost a child during pregnancy back in the 1980s. I know how hard that is from the husband’s perspective, and I can only imagine how much harder from the wife’s. Be strong. Whatever comes, you will handle it with grace.


  2. Your little boy will always know he was beyond loved. That’s yours and yours to hold for eternity, and not a single soul in the world can ever take that away from you.

    I have always wanted to adopt; adoption is wonderful – do consider it with an open heart 🙂 Equally, I have family who have gone through IVF and come out with the most beautiful little girl I have ever seen. Either way, and this may not be something you are willing to cope with, please please give your little one – however you choose to have him or her – a sibling, too. People I know who have had difficulty conceiving or difficulty coping with one child seem to think, ‘we have one, let’s just be grateful’. And I completely agree we SHOULD be grateful and it is not for everyone, but a sibling is so, so, so, so, so, so, so darn precious and valuable. And it means twice the heartbreak potential with twice the efforts to conceive a child, but when it is still possible, it will always, always enhance a child’s life. I’m only saying this out of honest care for your future child, please at least consider it – don’t let what has been happening dishearten you at all. Families are not always blood; love is far, far more important. Hell, the person we call our life partners, the ones we CREATE a family with, are not even blood…! So don’t fear, be brave and you will find a child to fill your love with.

    Lots and lots of luck to you. Keep us updated. 🙂


    • Sunrise: That is such a beautiful message. I wholeheartedly agree with you about having a family, a sibling for the little one and love being far more important that blood. Adoption is definitely on the cards. We have a few options to consider before adoption and hence the husband and I are working towards it. Thank you for your kind words. It means a lot since I haven’t been this elaborate in my personal life, the support on my blog is quite the anchor I seek.


  3. 🙂 I am so glad you agree. (I worry some people will take it too personally and rant at me that ‘you don’t know what it’s like raising just one child, how dare you speak to me about more than one’…) You are always welcome for the kind words, I very much mean them. I feel like I have grown up throughout my late teens and early twenties with your blog, so I am of course attached to your blog and wish you nothing but the best of course 🙂 Take your time and breathe deep. The support on your blog isn’t going anywhere. 🙂


    • Gulp! Have I been blogging for that long? “Throughout late teens to early Twenties”???

      Each to themselves though. Some of these decisions and opinions are very personal, or shared/madewith your most intimate partner. What you may think is right in your world may not necessarily work for others.

      I do agree with you though. There is a reason adoption/siblings/love prevails. It has a place in our society.


  4. Having had 5 miscarriages myself, I can relate to this post. I am indeed lucky to have 2 healthy daughters now, and am sending lots of thoughts and prayers your way.


    • That is a lot to deal with. A big hug to you. It has been almost 6 months and I still break down from time to time. Not so much in tears but in feelings. I never realized how hard it is on women and we don’t even talk about it. I am so happy, you have two children to show for all the pain you have been through. Thank you for your thoughts and prayers. The husband and I can do with all the prayers we can get.

      Liked by 1 person

      • I empathize, so much…allow yourself time to be sad, to mourn, but don’t let it consume you. I am a firm believer that God has His plan for us, we just have to let him guide us along the way. You and your hubby are on my prayer list! ❤


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