They don’t make ’em like that anymore

Only recently was I telling my I-want-to-believe-you-are-my-friend-but-am-not-so-sure-friend how difficult it is for us to make/have/keep friends. She agreed. We discussed how we have no time, energy, or patience for people any more. How we find being alone is easier than putting ourselves out there. I was left wondering what happened to us and the simple art of having friends.

Just when I was beginning to lose hope a friend emailed me telling me this one hour slot she might have to meet with me amongst the three whirlwind days of wedding she was attending in my city. I took her upon the offer and of course the one hour lasted three. It was amazing catching up on her newly married life her new plans and reminiscing the time we actually lived in the same time zone.

Taking that as a cue, I pinged a school mate visiting my city with her family of 5. I had not met this girl in the last twenty years. There I go date myself. What the hell I thought I am going to meet her and pretend she is my long lost friend. As the time approached, I realized except for a few like exchanges on Facebook I had not exchanged a word with her since school. I couldn’t remember much from school either. Not so sure about my much needed chatter session I decided to take my husband along. He, I think joined me for the amusement value. She must have thought the same, as she had brought along her husband as well.

The next couple of hours quickly passed by over several beers discussing Indian economics, European holiday destinations, American food, childhood memories, weddings, children and promises to visit each other again. Maybe next time in a fairly tale land..Who knows I might..

Who knows we may still know how to be friends but we just don’t make the effort. Sometimes we are just not honest. About how we feel, about what we want, about what makes us sad and what we hoped our friends would do for us.

I am not sure if they don’t make friends any more.. I wonder if we have forgotten how to be one..



Filed under Bonding, Camaraderie, Communication, Decisions, Emotions, Environment, Expectations, Experiences, Faith, Fears, Life, People, Personal, Relationships, Society, Thoughts, Wishes

7 responses to “They don’t make ’em like that anymore

  1. The fact is – we don’t have time anymore. When we were in school/college we spent an entire day with these people whom we call our best friends. You do spend time with your colleagues, but I guess the competitions stops you from being friends. Only if we had time…


    • Nisha, you feel it is competition? It is something for sure. It could be competition. I feel we are not comfortable being exposed by insecurities or our imperfections. It didn’t bother us when we were younger and that allowed us to be more genuine, but now it is harder. The instinct to protect ourselves, prohibits us from getting out there and being friends.. or it could be something else.. have to think about this one..


  2. Making friends is a long way away. Before that we’ll need to try and remember to keep our friends. I am now (re)learning that. πŸ™‚


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