I started a thought-pourri post several times in the past. I’ve lost my train of thoughts. I have lost the ability to think in full sentences. I have lost the ability to remember. I seem to have lost the ability to write. But here I am. Of all the things I have lost, I don’t want to lose you.
Came across a photo on Facebook. Took me down a memory lane, I didn’t really want to travel. Brought back memories of a happy time that went horribly wrong. For me. Reminded me of how foolish I had been. Reminded me I am still pretty much the same emotional fool. I just have to learn to make smarter choices.
I am at that point again. I am not going to let self doubt cripple me. I have used that as an excuse before. I feel like I have. There is no reason. There is only battles to be fought, and wars to be won. Even if the wars are within my own head. What needs to be done, has to be done.
There is another in my life I feel responsible for. That instinct comes up at some point in every woman’s life. I want to believe. I often think of the child I have not yet conceived. I think of the unborn and my responsibilities towards this child I hope to have one day. But will I have this child? That is a discussion for yet another blog post.
For now, I am going to go get pretty and meet some friends for brunch. Yes that is what I do when I am having a I-hate-life-its-so-shitty-day!