I have a blog post in the draft section. The title says Happy New Year and all that jazz. Before I could complete the post, I started to catch up on other posts only to find what I wanted to say was already said before. Only better. I am struggling from lack of expression. I am not sure though. Is it expression,or motivation to go that one step ahead and say what is on my mind. To take action. To give voice to my thoughts. To do what is on my mind. To transform thoughts into actions.
So I have decided to embark on a human experiment. Subject: Self
Step one: Deactivate Facebook account.
I can always reactivate it. I find myself peering over other people’s lives when my own seems boring or unbearable. It is almost a place I go to hide from reality. Reality of state of mind, of chores at hand,unfinished manuscripts, uncalled phone numbers, unwritten letters. So I am going to try and push myself towards doing things in real and not taking comfort behind a wall.
Step two: De-stress
I don’t do it enough. I don’t even know that I get stressed out, because I don’t know how to recognize the symptoms. Until one day when I break down. Sometimes in front people that understand me, sometimes in front of people who were just waiting for that moment to take advantage. Either way, it is my life and I should know better of how to deal with it. I will consciously make an effort to do one thing a week, that makes me happy.For example penning down my thoughts on this blog.
Step three:Learn something new
A language, a skill, a song, a meal. So much to learn, such little time. I have ideas brewing in my head. Will pen those down in weeks to come.
Step four: Travel
Unplanned, on a budget and most non-glamorous were the recipes of my last trip. I generally like to pack 30 things in a day. And this was a polar opposite of my regular vacation. I slept, ate, drank laid on the beach and drove aimlessly on beautiful wide roads. Was the most relaxing vacation I have had. I should definitely do this more often.
Step five: Talk, have real conversations
I think this has been discussed onto death. People don’t talk as much. With each other. Have honest conversations. Why? Oh well you know why. Apart from the obvious, I think it is inertia. We get away with not doing things we want to do. I have been promised a handwritten note in response to the new year card I sent 3/4 years ago.I am still waiting.* But apart from the food and drink and everything else on the previously mentioned step, I had conversations. Real honest conversations. They too serve as fuel for the soul.
I will stop here. You might say these are resolutions for the new year. They as might as well be. For me, this is a 5 step program for a better me. It is my own personal human experiment.
ps:*I am still hopeful. 🙂