Introspection: Chapter Facebook

I refer to her as the crazy Chinese lady that I lived with in my last year in U.K. I was very unhappy then and I had hoped that I would never cross paths with her. Over the years however I often reflect to that period of my life. I wonder about the choices I made then and what I could have done differently. I, to this date don’t understand why I never moved out of that accommodation especially since I was very unhappy. Surprisingly enough, I have heard myself give the crazy Chinese lady credit when I get complimented on good housekeeping, getting along with people, my ability to make no noise and life in general. I have sent her new year cards since I left U.K and was very happy to receive her note congratulating me on my wedding. I have added her on Fb and we have been exchanging notes. Funnily enough I feel that on another day or time she and I would actually make good friends.

I wonder if we are obligated to add people when they send us a friend invite. I have recently adopted a policy, that I wont add anyone who I haven’t met before. I don’t add people who I don’t want anything to do with. I don’t add people who I didn’t keep in touch with for a reason. I don’t add people who stopped keeping in touch with me for a reason. Some people I know and I am friends with and I still wont add. A friend who cannot stand the idea of social sites and the nuisance that comes with it, realised the potential of FB to reconnect with people. I didn’t add her, because I felt we didn’t need a site to be “friends”.  I felt we can be in touch by other means of communication.  I often get asked about this particular friend by common friends and I realize that the only insight I have into her life is what she tells me on our occassional phone conversations. I wonder if I should be concerend about our  limited communication or the fact that I am very comfortable with it?

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15 Comments

Filed under A first, Bonding, Camaraderie, Communication, Emotions, Experiences, Friends, Life, People, Personal, Relationships, Society, Thoughts

15 responses to “Introspection: Chapter Facebook

  1. Pingback: Introspection: Chapter Facebook « SUPERCALIFRAGILISTICEXPIALIDOCIOUS

  2. Pingback: Introspection: Chapter Facebook « SUPERCALIFRAGILISTICEXPIALIDOCIOUS – The Facebook News

  3. Something to munch on eh Edu, I mean det-res?

    Courtesy social networking sites : You know what, I have become close with, exchange pleasantries, and gupshup with those classmates, schoolmates, citymates whom I hardly knew then, never talked to, mostly quarreled with, disliked for reasons unknown to me now…
    strange…
    you made me introspect.

    Ash

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  4. PNA:
    Yeah! I think that is also a part of growing up. Thankfully.

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  5. Seems so strange….not tangible somehow

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  6. Hmm, I can never understand these social networking (web)sites. Social networking over internet !!!

    Few people tell me that you can find your lost friends. There can’t be a better oxymoron than “lost friends”. You never lose your friends!! if you have lost them, then it is for a reason..

    Also in India, I have noticed a new trend. All those who used to swear by a site called ‘orkut’ or chirkut or something like that, have now all started talking about “FB”. I thought FB could have been something different…

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  7. Hmm, I am fed up of my comments getting blocked..Jesus kill me !

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  8. No need to be concerned. Sometimes you are the boat and sometimes the occupant.

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  9. Jen

    Would agree with the friend who said FB helps to reconnect. I have personally had the wonderful experience of touching base with a lot of people from school days and it was an overwhelming feeling to just know where each one is, and the changes that have happened in all these years!

    At the same time, my answer to your “I wonder if we are obligated to add people when they send us a friend invite” would be a “NO. ABSOLUTELY NOT” at least as far as I am concerned.

    I too have had an experience with FB very recently that I have blogged about. Would love to hear your thoughts on the same.

    Hope all’s well otherwise.
    Cheers’

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  10. PNA:
    What is not tangible?

    White Magpie:
    I guess.

    Jen:
    Yeah I doubt there is an obligation.

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  11. GS:
    I think there is some fun to re-connecting with people. The whole ” friend” thing is a bit over–rated. I think. It is a social networking site, I think the name says it all.

    Why are you singling out Indians? Americans were on my-space and are now moving to FB. People are moving on from FB to Twitter. What is the big deal? Or does it bother you that you can’t keep up? 😛

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  12. About being blocked, I can unblock you but I was being visited by an imposter with your name and I felt at that time that he/she should not be allowed to comment if this person could not have the integrity to expose themselves. I am sorry.

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  13. AFJ

    How did we manage before facebook? Somehow I have seen this trend to add people on facebook within a day or two of meeting them! Why? I’d rather spend some time with you and find out who you are. I’d rather know about which movies you like from the person not the site. But there is also something to be said for getting back in touch and FB does that beautifully for the first few times! And then it’s back to business.

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  14. AFJ:
    I think I have said this on several platforms now, so I apologize for the repetition. We forget that Facebook is not a friend finder and keeper. It is a social networking site. Networking isn’t the same as friends and everything that comes with it. I don’t give it that much importance. Yes I do filter people I don’t want on my friend list. I have stated my reasons and then there is always the gut (feeling) that does so much of the convincing. 🙂

    How ever I do enjoy the aspect where I get to say oh man after so long. Awesome and blah and then like you said it is back to business. 🙂

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  15. Well its upto you isnt it.. 🙂 Add whom you want.. 🙂

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