When everything is not enough.

A few years ago I decided to attend a friend’s wedding. Friends do such things. Normally. Except I hadn’t spoken to this friend for some years. We had drifted apart as friends and I had nothing left in common with her. Ego and misunderstanding can do irreparable damage to relationships. Even very good and strong ones. I wasn’t even invited by her but her mother. I was sad that we had reached a point that she did not even want me at her wedding. Or care.

I decided to go. I knew or atleast hoped that this was the only wedding my friend would have. If I didn’t make it to this one, I would have missed one in a lifetime moment. I knew she was busy, anxious, nervous and everything else that a person would feel just before getting married. I also knew that I had shared more good than bad with her. I knew I missed my friend and I wanted to be a part of her big day in whatever small way I could.

My ego was something I had control over. Sometimes people don’t have control over things. Jobs, visa, travel time, money, bosses, but most importantly will-power. That doesn’t come easy. Making an effort for someone else is even harder. Sharing someone else’s happiness as a priority does not even strike most people. Not making enough effort is easy, especially in the day and time when doing everything is also not enough.



Filed under Life

10 responses to “When everything is not enough.

  1. couldn’t have put it better. sometimes it’s better to the the bigger and better person but wouldn’t it be nice if that person was sometimes not you?


  2. “Ego and misunderstanding can do irreparable damage to relationships.” – sad, yet true.


  3. hmmm .. I have a vice.. My ego does not rise fast.. but when it does… it is bad.. so I say you did something which I would not bother.. hahah..
    Bad of me.. but well I accept that.. sigh


  4. So did you go finally? What happened?

    While on the topic of weddings, I remember I went to this friend’s wedding (unlike the above we hadn’t drifted apart, just not met in a while) and she couldn’t recognize when I went up on stage to greet her.


  5. thats such a nice gesture. kudos


  6. I hope she talked to you and you somehow patched things up during (or after) the event.

    People come and people go and people come back. 😉


  7. Sigh.
    Hats off to you. I would never have done it if I were you. I think more than the hurt ego, it’s the hurt alone most people have trouble dealing with. What’s broken is broken… even if you try piecing it back together again, the cracks always remain.

    … and in spite of that, you made it! Way to go.


  8. Sanny:
    Sometimes, I agree. Sometimes we should let other people be the bigger better one’s. We should learn how to.

    Sometimes it amazes me when I find out that I have actually grown out of people.

    The variety in people is what makes life so interesting.

    White Magpie and everyone else who asked this question:
    There were hugs, and tears, some very uncomfortable silences and conversations. We are friends again. I am really glad I made the decision I made. It restored my faith in relationships.

    OMG, that is funny. I am so sorry for you. That must have been embarrassing.

    Thank you! 🙂

    I like the ones that come back.

    I agree people are very fragile, but they can be reasonable too. Thank you.


  9. lid? the analog lid? :-/ i think thats like the funniest typo i have seen EVER


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