Resident will come later. I suppose. I have mentioned earlier about the pen-pal mania that I had. Over a hundred on the last count. Several years ago. I have all the letters, gifts, stamps and what have you all accumulated in a suit case that I haven’t opened in over 8 years now. Also added to them are cards and letters and notes from medical school.
For some time now my mother has wanted to me to sort my paper ‘stuff’ out and get rid of the suitcase and assimilate every thing I have in my solitary cupboard. I am not sure what I have been resisting so far. Confinement to a single piece of furniture in the apartment or a tete-a-tete with emotions I have been avoiding to experience.
A few envelopes and lots of tears down the line I knew it had to be the latter.
I have managed to get past some of the packets. I have also managed to get rid of a lot of cards and letters. I am still going to keep some. I am allowed to stuff the cupboard the way I like and I chose to keep my memories with me for a while.
One of the few things that I did was also keep bad memories. Like angry letters, abusive notes and torn photographs. As a reminder to keep me humble. Lest I ever forget how ugly things get. How low people can stoop. To always caution me. That no matter how beautiful life gets, there is always a down side to it.
I am determined to let that go. I am determined to get that negativity out of my life. So I have embarked on this project. It is hard to let go, but I know the effort is going to be worth it.