01.17.06
All I want..
You thought you had no time
to spare,
When all I wanted was a moment,
that was mine.
For a lifetime to cherish.
You feared you had no feelings,
left in you.
When all I wanted was a single true emotion,
between us.
That time couldn’t diminish.
You told me you had nothing left to give,
except emptiness.
When all I wanted was hope, that some day,
in your heart,
love will flourish.
You don’t have to give, make an effort,
or even try.
All I want is for you to know,
my world is a better place,
because you walked by.
Sher-e-Jalandhar said,
January 17, 2006 at 10:54 am
I came, I read and I copy-pasted it.
Accidental Fame Junkie said,
January 17, 2006 at 12:03 pm
I loved the last stanza the best! It’s very well done!
WishfulThinker said,
January 17, 2006 at 12:54 pm
Nice!! I don’t know what else to say, so I will not say anything. Except that it was very nice. And I loved it.
ankur said,
January 17, 2006 at 7:31 pm
very nice…! tried your luck at poetry.com…(am serious). they have an ongoing competition for poets such as you…!
go and figure…will be interesting…(unless ofcourse u r like me…who jst likes to write…not read)
~a
PuNeEt said,
January 17, 2006 at 7:35 pm
OOhoooooooo
wow… thatz so beautiful
You don’t have to give, make an effort,
or even try.
All I want is for you to know,
my world is a better place,
because you walked by
awesome… luvd this
am so touched by reading this poem…. very well written :-))
BTW… wen r u coming to Mbai ???
take care
Cheers
lazy leo said,
January 17, 2006 at 8:09 pm
Wow…..beautiful thoughts……
way to go, girl….. eagerly waiting for more poetry from you…
luv,
educatedunemployed said,
January 17, 2006 at 9:28 pm
S-e-j:
Accidental Fame Junkie:
So nice to see you on my blog. Thank you.
The last stanza is where I began funnily enough..
Wishfulthinker:
Thank you.
I don’t know what else to say, so I will not say anything.
NO NO we want you to say more.We want you to dissect every word and throw your 2 cents over it.We love reading what you come up with.
educatedunemployed said,
January 17, 2006 at 9:36 pm
Ankur:
Thanks..
No competetions for me.I am trying.I want to improve.Never thought I had it in me to write a poem and I have a long way to go.I have been to that site only to know more about poetry writing.I will definitely work on it.I am totally enjoying this journey.
Puneet:
Thanks..:)
Bombay..mid year some time.
LazyLeo:
Thanks…
We are open to constructive criticism.:).Definitely want to develop this aspect.
Rohit Talwar said,
January 17, 2006 at 11:54 pm
Mallikaaaaaaaaaa
How did you come up with these lines? They’re soo nice!!
Rock on!
I copied it.. I have this knack of keeping stuff i like.. dont mind!
Vikram said,
January 18, 2006 at 3:15 am
//You don’t have to give, make an effort,
or even try.
All I want is for you to know,
my world is a better place,
because you walked by//
Whoa! Midblowing. Truly sensational.
vishwa said,
January 18, 2006 at 10:30 am
Appears like a lot of bloggers have put on their poetry hats today. I came across atleast 4 places where the posts were such simple short poems.
It’s a nice poem, Edu.
educatedunemployed said,
January 18, 2006 at 1:51 pm
Rohit:
Thanks…:D
Of course I don’t mind.
Vikram:
Thank you thank you thank you.
Vishwa:
Thanks Vishwa.I have come across a lot of wonderful poems on the blogosphere.Its been motivational.I am glad I have looking around too.There is a lot I have learnt and enjoyed.
Casablanca said,
January 18, 2006 at 3:49 pm
Beautiful! And echoes my sentiments totally… as I mentioned some days back, every small gesture counts
educatedunemployed said,
January 18, 2006 at 9:45 pm
Casablanca:
You bet girl..and some people don’t realise that they don’t have to make an effort.If only they could just be them.
Rohit Talwar said,
January 18, 2006 at 10:39 pm
Cool. cos even if you do, do I care?
educatedunemployed said,
January 18, 2006 at 11:56 pm
Rohit:
Awwe..Bhalai ka to jamana hi nahi raha…:p
Thanu said,
January 19, 2006 at 12:53 am
U write real good poems…
Sounds so true
educatedunemployed said,
January 19, 2006 at 12:58 am
Thanu:
So nice to see you back girl.
Thank-you..:)
Ginkgo said,
January 19, 2006 at 3:03 am
ah I c..
ur time starts now..
take as many ‘moments’ as u wud want…
letz see what u do with it
educatedunemployed said,
January 19, 2006 at 4:58 am
Ginkgo:
Wow you give that too under time and performance pressure..Jeez!
Thanu said,
January 19, 2006 at 5:52 am
kya see me back, I was never gone…
dwaipayan said,
January 19, 2006 at 9:01 am
its my 1st visit. and …..i’ll come again. its a wonderful poem man. not so long ago, i used to feel like this,too.
Ginkgo said,
January 19, 2006 at 12:07 pm
pressure? wat pressure….:P
aSh said,
January 19, 2006 at 2:45 pm
whatever u said is so true …with one person or the other who walk by us everyday .isn’t it ….
it is human nature i guess not to realise at times without the help of intimation with words about the others’ feelings …
like Pradeep in his blog said lingua pura i guess if i am right a language without words …
i just love the third lines of the the 4 stanzas …cool girl
Love and hugs to my EU
Ash
educatedunemployed said,
January 19, 2006 at 5:11 pm
Thanu:
Dwaipayan:
Hey welcome here.Thanks.And see you around.
Ginkgo:
Your time starts now and lets see what you can do with it..sounds a bit pressurizing don’t u think???
Ash:
Some times,it doesn’t take much for some one to have had a profound effect on you.Could be anyone…
Thanks girl..:)
Rohit Talwar said,
January 19, 2006 at 11:00 pm
kalyug aa gaya hai, bhul gaye?
Ginkgo said,
January 19, 2006 at 11:20 pm
yeh..but I never specified an end time..Did I
and yeh..as to the hugs..my statement still stands..:-)
Abaniko said,
January 20, 2006 at 5:30 am
Beautiful! Love without being too emotional. Thanks for dropping by my blog. I think I have another site here to visit often. Great entries!
Atul Sabnis said,
January 20, 2006 at 9:12 pm
Nice. we look at life as transactions only, eh?
thanks for dropping by.
Obi Wan said,
January 20, 2006 at 10:07 pm
Thank you.
educatedunemployed said,
January 20, 2006 at 10:20 pm
Rohit:
Oops, how could I..:p
Ginkgo:
Yeah right…
educatedunemployed said,
January 20, 2006 at 10:23 pm
Abaniko:
..:)..thank-you for coming by.
I’ve been frequenting your blog for some time now.See you around.
Atul Sabnis:
Thank you…
See ya around.
Obi wan:
You are welcome??!!
Obi Wan said,
January 20, 2006 at 10:27 pm
The Thank You was for writing the poem, and for posting it. It was really good.
educatedunemployed said,
January 20, 2006 at 10:31 pm
Obi wan:
Right!!!..:D..You are welcome.
Archster said,
January 22, 2006 at 2:23 pm
very well written!
educatedunemployed said,
January 22, 2006 at 11:34 pm
Archster:
Thank you..:)